Monday Motivation: Perks and Perils of Being Passionate

United succumbed to a disappointing 1-3 defeat in the Manchester Derby. Photo Courtesy - goal.com

Have you ever felt so happy that it felt like your lungs would burst out of your chest? Have you ever felt so sad that it's hard to even breathe? Well, we are practically family then!

While a lot of things make me emotional, nothing gets me going like football. So it was only fair that I was heartbroken at Manchester United's defeat in the Manchester Derby at the weekend. I had been following the Red Devils for almost 2 decades now and while I have seen them (on the television ofcourse!) lift every trophy possible, each defeat still hurts deep inside. And the loss to Manchester City ruined my Sunday, my dinner and a good night's sleep.

Which brings me to my current predicament - why are we like this? (I am ofcourse assuming that I am not the only one drowning in my own pool of tears!). You see, we could easily be content with the first sign of achievement, the first trophy, the first win and say - "Yeah, I've supported them, they have won a game, it has been worthwhile, let us support someone else for a change." Yes, we could easily do that. So why do we allow ourselves to be so indulged in some things in our lives?

Why are we so attached with the teams we follow, the messiahs (see what I did there?) we worship? Why do we feel heartbroken a million miles away from the action? Why do we let opposition fans troll and mock us without restrain? The answer isn't obvious, but it's just what happens when you feel passionate about something in your life. Your passion moves you, lifts you, breaks you and makes you. It's both your saviour and your tormentor, yet life would be pretty dull in its absence.

It is necessary to be passionate

It is not just sports that people are passionate about. It could be reading a book, it could be playing the guitar. It could be the call of the road, Wanderlust and the desire to travel. It could be listening to music, it could be dancing your heart out.

(Also Read - Monday Motivation: Wanderlust and the call of the Road)

There is a subtle difference between hobby and passion. Where as hobbies are considered to be a relaxing way to pass time, passions do not let you just relax. Instead, your passion engages you, drives you and comes back to you relentlessly. You are engrossed in it and it is so enticing that you are willing to suffer for it.

It is something that churns your emotions, sends them in a turmoil, makes you laugh, makes you sad, touches you deep within. For starters, it keeps you engaged, indulged and provides a shot of excitement in your life. Something to think about the whole day, in between work. Then there's the motivation factor. It inspires you, edges you on, urges you to keep trying and helps you up when you fall. Being passionate makes life worthwhile.

Sometimes people find their calling and invest in it, making a profession out of their passion. However rare that might be, it is as simple as loving what you do and doing it all day long. For the other unfortunate people like us, we have to find time within our jobs, our daily routine to keep fueling our interests.

Psychologists now a days believe that having a passion is directly associated with physical and mental well being of a person and as such, if you are not passionate about something in life yet, now is a good time to start.

Finding Your Calling

They say your calling shall come to you naturally, but life is not always that romantic. If the river doesn't flow by your house, build your home by the riverside. Or something like that.

Just like everything else in one's life, you can develop and find something to be passionate about in life. Start by sorting out what makes you happy and yes, sleep doesn't count! It has to be something that gives you immense satisfaction, like playing a favourite tune on the guitar, going on walks early in the morning, history, politics, reading, writing, sports, health, fitness.

There's an inherent risk in pursuing your passion that draws everyone back. The most common factor is humiliation - what will people say? What if I fail? What if it doesn't work? And this is where most of the problems lie. We cannot live our lives on what ifs, neither can we expect people to understand everything we do. I have received a lot of stick in life for my craze about football, but I have, with time, learnt the secret to dealing with humiliation. It is by surrounding yourself with people who understand you and your passion - friends, people who share your passion and family.

The one thing that keeps you alive

Everyone needs a little spice in their lives, something that makes one feel alive. Technically, this is your calling, it is something that comes naturally to you and something that doesn't fade with time.

While my love of Football, Manchester United and Messi might be quite evident to the people who know me well, my real calling came when my Father inspired me to pick up a pen years ago and write something from the heart. It started small, but the joy when my parents read my work and liked it was unmatched. Those little words of encouragement, that pat on the back that made everything sweeter would forever remain etched in my memory.

The pen and paper have been replaced, to a great extend, by my laptop, but the emotions they generated have remained the same. Just like me, this applies to all the passionate people in the world. There is a mystic charm in doing something you love. Like the warmth of the morning sun on a foggy winter morning, it is both satisfying and inspiring. It is what completes us and keeps us alive.

Staying Passionate

It is hard to pick up a passion, but it is harder to stay passionate through out your lives. Especially when your team has been humiliated 1-3 by your local rival! But that is the beauty of life - it is the agonies and ecstasies that are etched forever in our memories.

When you feel passionately about something in your life, you do not care about the outcome, you do not care about the failure, about the jeers and the very public (thanks to the social media) humiliation. Because your passion becomes your inspiration and nothing can take it away from you.  The few moments of ecstasy are worth their weight in gold and they outlive the moments of disdain.

So, if like me, you are going through a low, drag yourself up and dust yourself. The end is not here. This all but a minor block on the road. Cause we have mountains to climb and rivers to pass. The highs are passingly pleasurable, the lows stay around a bit longer, I admit, but even the pains do not last forever. Trust me, at the end of our lives, it will be a memorable journey, all the very sweeter because you had something to believe in.

Have you ever felt so happy that your lungs could burst out of your chest? Have you ever felt so sad that it's hard to even breathe? Well, congratulations, you are alive.

Have a wonderful week ahead.

Monday Motivation: Wanderlust and the call of the Road

A picture from years ago, which always urges me to keep the wanderlust alive [Photo Credit - Sudip Pandit]

I recently went on a long drive to fuel my wanderlust. The positive was that it was a long drive home and when you take the route home, the world always looks rosier. However, it was only when I was returning back, at the end of my holidays, that a certain thought struck me. 

It was a beautiful afternoon outside, my stomach was full of the wonderful Pork curry I savored at Bongaigaon and my tongue was still relishing the reminiscent flavours. The road was empty, Mohit Chauhan was singing “Phir se Udd Chala” on the stereo and I was feeling a bit nostalgic, wishing that I could have spent a few days more at home. I snapped out of my daydream with the sound of drums beating at a distance. 

Bit by bit, the sound got louder, until I realized the actual source of the sounds. As the long stretch ended in a turn, I saw a group of Bikers emerge from the bend, passing through the trees on the other side of the highway, the deafeaning thumps of their engines piercing through the afternoon. 

One by one they sped away, in their riding gears and their thunderous machines. Hands covered in gloves, knees and shins protected by guards, helmets, goggles, masks, the riders were in their full attire. I saw 20 of them, before I lost count midway through the sight of them flashing away on the other lane. 

As I turned to focus on the road ahead, I stepped out of my nostalgia and found my thoughts drifting into the riders. Where were they heading to? Had they just started or were they returning home? There were a million thoughts which I could ponder on, but I found my concentration fixated on one simple question – why were they traveling?

What is this urge that draws us out of our homes, out of our comfort zones? Why do we desire to explore? This wanderlust is inherent in all of us. Wanderlust, which strangely is a German word, made way into my dictionary when I first heard it in the Satyajit Ray classic "Agantuk", years ago. 

It is a word that has fascinated me ever since, as it has fascinated millions like myself, who have been bitten by the travel bug. Wanderlust is the urge to travel, the constant yearning to see some place new, the desire to pack your bags and hit the road.

What draws us out?

Those ride back home from Bhutan are some of my most cherished memories

I remember when I first joined work in Bhutan, I used to get up early on Sundays and drive 120 Kilometers on my motorcycle to reach Malbazar. I guess coming back home is the greatest reason to hit the road. I have been in many trips since then, big and small, however, I realized the real call of the road on the back of personal disaster. 

It was the third quarter of 2012. I was lost, aimless in life, getting over the bereavement of the pillar of my life. Even the impending Durga Puja had no excitement, as the life had just gone out of my world a couple of months back. I was in the darkest corner possible and then Wanderlust came to my rescue.

It started small, initiating over a cup of tea with colleagues, talking about the wonderful feeling of the wind on your face. Pretty soon, we were chalking plans for a one day drive of 350 Kilometers and incidentally, things fell into place pretty easily. So on early morning on 2^nd October 2012, we left for Cherrapunji from Guwahati – 4 people, two motorcycles and a lifetime of memories. 

Everyone of us had different motivations to be on the trip. For me, it was to get away from my suffocated life and breathe easy. I wanted to leave the pains behind, I wanted to be somewhere else, I wanted to experience something different. I wanted to mingle among the unknown and forget everything for a brief moment. I wanted respite.

It was not easy. There were risks associated with the trip. It was the first time I would venture in such a long drive since my Father, my pillar of life, had passed away earlier that year, and naturally, friends and family were concerned. It did not take too much to convince them, maybe they felt my pains too, saw how much I needed it, or maybe they wanted me to try to be happy for a change. 

I could not define happiness at that moment, but I had an insatiable yearning to go on the trip. It was as if the road was calling me out, the hills and fog and pine trees were waiting for me. I wanted this, and at that moment, I wanted it more than anything else.

It is this desire that draws us out. To feel something different, to be somewhere new, to leave some things behind.  To breathe, to start fresh, to relive your life. To forgive, forget and move on. Everyone has a different reason to hit the road. Only those who dare to step out are blessed with a life changing experience. Because every journey you take changes you from inside.

How the road changes You

There is a strange comfort in unknown roads that cannot be put to words [Photo Credit - Manoj Prasad]

All those years ago, the experience shook me up. I went into the trip, a broken boy on his trusted Intrepido (which, incidentally, is the name of my Motorcycle) and I returned a mended man. I cannot write what changed me, or how I changed, but I could feel it then and I can feel it now, years later.

After a whole day of riding, I was physically exhausted, and the 7 layers of dust on me had rendered me unrecognizable to say the least. As I washed my face for the umpteenth time, I felt different. With every layer of mud that was washed off me, I felt cleansed, I felt lighter and I felt content. This is how the road changes you and this was how the trip had changed me with every passing moment.

We had started well, leaving the hustle and bustle of the city behind and entering peace and tranquil early in the morning. The air seemed different, purer and the hills were the perfect shade of green. The blue skies smiled on to us as we raced through the winding road to reach the Umiam Lake, the gateway to Shillong. The first breather and the breath of fresh air. 

My mind had long soared far away from my worries and pains and had indulged in the beauty of Shillong. I felt rejuvenated, charged up and inspired to see life through. So much to see, so many places to visit, so much to do yet. All through the road till we reached Cherrapunji, these feelings took over me. 

By the time we had reached our destination and were looking down into the plains of Bangladesh far away, my mind was clear. The place was unusually quiet, tranquil. There was a mystic fog looming, appearing and vanishing from time to time. It seemed to have been bitten by the travel bug too, just like us. I felt free, I felt alive.

That lunch somewhere in the Wilderness near Cherrapunji will forever be etched in my heart

The four of us had lunch by the side of a cliff, looking at the seven sister falls and down into a deep gorge. We lay on the soft grass and dozed off for a moment. It was so peaceful that I felt like settling down, building a house, staying forever. When we left, we had taken a chunk of the hills deep within us, with a little waterfall, green valleys and long winding roads.

My whole body ached that night, as I tossed and turned, almost too tired to sleep. My heart was content though, because when I closed my eyes, I saw myself soaring through the road among the pines, under the clear skies and  past the silvery waterfalls. It was on that road that I had found peace. But I had found something else too. I had found brotherhood, I had found company and I had learnt to be social.

I had settled under the blue skies and shared bread and bananas with my colleagues. There was the yummiest curry to dip into, made of fish eggs that tasted heavenly among the hills. I had driven with 3 people from work for a whole day and at the end of the journey had made three new friends. I had found comfort in company after months, and had finally decided to ditch my melancholy solitude. 

After I returned back, I realized that life was too short to live in regrets, I realized that sadness can be overcome by fond memories, by rejoicing, by living, by being grateful to be alive. I returned and realized I had many reasons to live. I saw that I still had a lot to look forward to. I found comfort on the road and I knew I would be back again.

Keeping the wanderlust alive

Year after year, again and again, I stepped out, with my compatriots or by myself, but I was never alone. I had a long stretch of road ahead of me, I had the company of the cool, clear breeze and I had my Wanderlust to cheer me on. I passed by various people, I discovered new places, I found new roads that led me to unforgettable experiences. Most of all, I rediscovered myself. Because every time I went on a journey, I came back a better person.

I made friends of a lifetime on that trip

Have you ever looked out of your window and wished that you were somewhere else? Have you peeked out of the glass panes of your office and noticed the blue sky calling out to you, asking you to leave your worries behind and go on an adventure? Many of us come back from a trip and immediately start planning our next. It is very essential to keep the spirit of travel alive, because Wanderlust is a motivator like no other.

As you start the week, make sure you keep that yearning alive. Look within yourself and find your Wanderlust. Feed that desire to explore a new place, make those plans and imagine yourself far away from where you are right now. Imagine bright sunny mornings, cool, chilly afternoons and a star studded night. And emphasize on building that friendship, that companionship which makes life worthwhile.

Even after all these years, I am grateful that I hit the road that day, I am thankful that my colleagues, my friends pulled me out and took me for a ride of a lifetime. Because it really changed my life and took me where I wanted to go. So step out, discover yourself and come back a changed person.

Have a great week ahead!